AN INTRODUCTION AND SOME ANSWERS TO FAQs

I'm adopting from China.

I knew that it would be a long and detailed process but it's taking a very, very long time, even longer than I anticipated.

Why adoption?
I'm single with a few health issues that don't go well with pregnancy. But more than that I don't believe in creating a life (in MY situation) when there are so many children in need of families. I know from small children of friends and family that I don't have to have a genetic relationship to be able to love them - my relationship with my stepfather also reinforces this opinion.
I've also been told that one of the hardest parts of parenting is parenting a child who is exhibiting your own weaknesses?

Why China?
A simple question that really splits into 2:
1. Why not domestic adoption?
I'm not comfortable with the situation of domestic adoption - particularly contact with biological family. Also, without breaking any confidences - because of experiences of friends with the UK system.
2. If not domestic adoption then why China?
Lots of reasons, too many to list but including: the reliability of the international adoption process with China, the lack of corruption within China's system - all adoptions are regulated by the government, the age of children available. Also only 1 trip is necessary to complete the process and the Chinese adoption is recognised in the UK so readoption is not necessary. Very importantly it's a culture that I find fascinating and will be able to foster at home for the rest of my life. Also my experience with my stepfather (people assuming he was my father and the uncomfortable feeling when explaining the error) - I wanted a child who it would be clear was not my biological child, adoption is to be valued and not hidden.

How does the process work?
Slowly, very slowly!
To begin with it's similar to the domestic adoption process - first there are lots of meetings with a social worker, who then writes a homestudy - all about me, my values, attitudes, experiences, friends, lifestyle and how parenthood will change these and the plans I have made, etc, etc. Then I had to go to 'Panel' - a group who all have a link with adoption or the county council - they read the homestudy and interview me and my social worker, then they decide if I'm suitable to be a parent.
Having passed Panel a domestic adopter would then wait to be matched with an available child, but with International adoption there's more to do! China requires more detail (paperwork, photos, certificates and more paperwork) - this is then sent off to officialdom, first the Welsh Assembly and then the Dfes, notaries, Chinese Embassy and then finally to China.
What next? Waiting, waiting and more waiting - interspersed with rumours, worry, uncertainty, worry and more waiting.

How long does it take?
Becoming a mum became a priority for me following my Mum's death in October 2003. Adoption became my chosen route to being a mum by Christmas 2003. It took me several months to find the courage to ring Social Services - they came for the first visit in February 2004. I went on a waiting list. At short notice I attended a preparation course at the end of September 2004. My homestudy began in November 2004 and was completed in February 2005. I went to Panel in May 2005. My paperwork went off to the UK authorities in June 2005 - having toured many parts of the UK (Cardiff, London, Crickhowell and finally several parts of London) my dossier was collected by DHL on 14th October 2005 and arrived in Beijing on the 17th! Sounds so simple, doesn't it? That's 2 years to get my application to China.
My dossier entered the official queue on 1st November 2005 - this is known as my LID (Log In Date).


How much longer will it take?
How long is a piece of string? IF anyone knows they haven't told me or the rest of those in the queue, considering entering the queue or anyone that any of them know. Rumours vary - probably between January and September 2007, ish, maybe, perhaps - get the picture?

Meanwhile I wait and try to make the most of the end of singledom - doing the non child- friendly activities that I might miss in the future - but more of that another time.

Finally . . .
. . . welcome to my blog, thanks for reading and please send me a message - I'd be interested to share your thoughts.