Saturday, October 03, 2009


Alice told me last night that it was time for bed, as I put her to bed she told me she needed a lie-in in the morning - even without that I knew she was tired. She slept til 8:30 this morning and we then had a gentle start to the day and Alice was delighted to have a very leisurely bath! Despite our gentle start she was tearful before we even made it downstairs and grumpy for the rest of the morning.

By lunchtime I had a humdinger of a headache and so all our plans were shelved. I was intending to stew this year's apple crop (which was very poor) and then make some mini apple pies - to eat for Mid Autumn Festival, family fruit in a round shape, I thought it appropriate, but it didn't happen. Instead Alice watched a film as I sort of snoozed. She had a cupcake after supper (which we've done every year), she stayed up late to look for the moon, but it was cloudy. We read 'We See the Moon' and talked about her birth family in China and Granny and Grandpa on the stars, we sent them all kisses to the sky. Then at bedtime I sang her 'I See the Moon' and explained that I used to sing it while I was waiting for her, she listened and then told me I was silly - one day she might understand!

We don't celebrate many Chinese festivals, but this is the one that always makes me very emotional - thinking of a birth family far away, wondering if they remember their beautiful baby and wonder what happened to her, wishing they knew she was loved and happy, my treasure.

(And the photos - each MAF from 2007 onwards, huge changes every year, she surely can't go on changing this much?)

1 comment:

Three Motherlands said...

It's always bittersweet, these times when we remember our children's birth families with the clearest intention. The emotions we feel are so intense and well, to use the word again, 'bittersweet'.

For now, our girls are still a bit young to make deep sense of it all ... but that day is coming swiftly. I find that it's hard not to project the things that we hope are happening in the hearts of those we'll likely never know ...

For me, the only thing that consoles my heart is having faith that all has unfolded as it was meant to be. Small comfort, I know.

But it is also a time for rejoicing and celebrating ... so ... Happy Mid-Autumn Moon Harvest to you and Alice, from all of us! xxx