Friday, January 01, 2010


Firstly I want to make it clear that there is no one to blame for the outcome of my second adoption application.

A new SW (someone I've met, not necessarily MY new SW) has already asked me how I feel about the experiences of the last 17 months or so, was Thailand a waste of time? I don't think so, I prefer to think of it as part of the process of accepting a change of direction, making me consider my priorities.

When the whole adoption process started for me 6 years ago, I was put on the wrong waiting list and waited 10 months when the process should have started more quickly - I don't blame anyone for that, it may have been due to the grieving process that I was consumed with, it may have been a misunderstanding, but ultimately it made the timing right for Alice and I to become a family and I'm extremely grateful that she ended up with me and me with her. So I can't regret the additional waiting time, it all worked in the end and that's how I choose to see this application, I hope that one day I'll be able to confirm that it was all part of getting the timing right for the child who will become my daughter and Alice's Little Sis. I hope that rather than a waste of time it was a diversion to make the timing right.

I received an email this evening from G, she quoted:
"Someday the child that is meant for you will be your child and when that day finally comes you will want no other child."

It's been proved right once, so right. I hope it holds true again, I believe it will, I have to believe it will.


Sharon said...

Only you know what's right for you and your family.

Good luck with it all and I hope to hear news soon of your new little bub!


Kiy said...

I was just popping in to say hello and wish you and Alice a Happy New Years - when I read your blog post. I am SO darned impressed with your mindset, I wish I had felt that way while we were waiting on Miss Emi. I feel that way now, it's so much easier after!

Also, good for you for addressing what is good and needed for your family and going for it. I hope you don't stop blogging - maybe make it private ('course you know I'll be badgering for an invite!), but I will miss reading of your adventures. I also look forward to your positive outlook on things (this post is a perfect example!).

I've not been a good blogging friend lately (this move has really taken a toll) but I have resolved to be a better friend and blogger this year - and that *includes* commenting! :)

Cheers, good luck, thinking of you,